Update: Padang is Fucked

As of this morning, the death toll has reached 1,100 with thousands more injured and feared dead. A lack of heavy machinery has hindered the rescue operation. The main Dr M Djamil Hospital was mostly destroyed and there are not enough doctors or facilities to help the overwhelming numbers of wounded. Most of the city, [...]

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Across the Universe: Sumatra Earthquake

It’s easy to look at the Indonesian and Pacific earthquakes and see the disaster and not comprehend it. I have a brother, though, and he lives in the Mentawai Islands near Padang. He is safe, his wife is safe, the friends they can contact are safe. The rest? They’re not so sure. There’s also thousands [...]

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Fuck Robots, Love Women

This is so smart. The Japanese government plans to increase the child allowance to encourage couples to have more babies. Failing that, there are two other options: build robots to pick up excess work, or increase immigration. I suppose it’s too much to ask that the Japanese government consider restructuring the workplace and entrenched cultural [...]

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Stay classy, Dov Charney.

The Advertising Standards Authority in the UK has banned an American Apparel advertisement – I would describe it, but I’d probably get aroused writing such erotic literature.
At first, I was all “hells fuckin yeah about time” regarding the ruling; after reading the article, I’m not so sure. Yes, American Apparel advertising is lewd, porny and [...]

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The Fight Was Over Before We Even Said No.

Sometimes things are predestined. We call it fate. We call it destiny. We call it the just the way things are.
What if things weren’t that way? What if we decided that women weren’t lesser, weren’t so bad, weren’t the bearers of original sin? What if we respected women in every sense of the term?
I arrived [...]

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Pope: “AIDS? Schmaids!”

Pope Benedict looks like the devil. Those dark circles under his eyes, the hunchback posture, the aging face and yet suspiciously lustrous hair. There’s something not right going on there, and that’s not just because he’s a geriatric virgin dropping hell bombs on condoms. But! Now that I’ve brought that up, shall we consider his [...]

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You! Suck!

I’ve often considered suing Channel 7 News because of false advertising. Whatever they’re presenting, it definitely doesn’t appear to fit into even the most lax definitions of “news”. For ten minutes, it jumps from idiotic subject to even dafter report covering such pertinent topics as roundabouts harming possums, the epidemic of old people dying from [...]

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The Worst is Never Coming.

I’ve spent some time realising that new relationships are the best kind of awkward satisfaction: you spend your first weeks sexing, telling them how much you love their third nipple because it’s so unique and not at all weird, over-thinking whether to fake an orgasm or telling them you like scat porn and really [...]

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A Lover of Antiquity.

A half-blind monkey on LSD could identify George Clooney as a genetically attractive human being, but it takes a certain calibre of person to look at the likes of Nick Cave or Steve Buscemi and want to get down and dirty (and possibly, creepy) with them. Luckily, a person of such calibre happens to be [...]

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Periodic Madness.

There are two new commercials out in Australia for feminine hygiene products (stupid term, total unnecessary downer on vaginas). While one company has taken tampon manufacturing to new heights, the other seems at a loss as to where to go next with pad technology. Let’s examine:

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